Schism

When I was a teenager, I felt fairly composed and mature for my age. I also felt like I was strong in my opinions, reasoned, and that they would be immutable with age. I had a recent conversation with My Beloved about a Frontline or PBS program he had seen on Facebook privacy and teens. In the program, teens went on a trip to NYC and got loaded on the train ride. There were ER visits and much of the escapade was video taped and posted. One parent, on the PTA, found out about it and sent an email to all the other PTA parents to alert them to the goings on and encourage a conversation with their teen. My Beloved asked if I thought she was right to do this?

In answering, I am aware of how differently I see myself now from my younger self. Yes, I thought she was right and would likely have done the same. It's almost as if these generations, parent and child, are at war and, like POWs, each is obligated to harass the enemy as much as possible. As a teen, I operated in strict pursuit of accomplishing my own objectives. If those aligned with others' goals, so much the better. If not, well, we each had our own destiny to pursue. I imagine I would feel the same, now, but from the perspective of a parent. My objective would be to protect and educate, without negotiation.

We don't have these theoretical kinds of conversations about parenting often. However, each time I am reminded how grateful I am to have a choice about being a parent, and how blessed I am to have been raised by people better than me.