Joie de Vivre

Ok, Maybe This Once

2012-01-26T19:40:00.002-05:00

http://www.npr.org/2012/01/26/145910143/the-public-respects-civility-but-rewards-rudeness

When Dubyah was in office, he came through my area several times during elections and once his motorcade drove right past my office. I romanticized to my husband how, if I'd only known he was so close, I'd have put a sign in the office window (aka "free speech zone") sharing my opinions on his presidency and his moral character. My Beloved frequently questioned me when I got in a rant like that: "yeah, but if he knocked on your door, would you let him in?" The question being, would I show respect to the office even if I didn't respect the man. The question always worked to bring me up short and make me reflect a little better on what I wanted to express. Some days I was convinced that I'd slam the door in his face; other days, I wanted to invite him in to ask the hard questions to his face.

Reading the linked article above (doesn't that photo just make you cringe?) and hearing that Romney publicly called Obama a "failed leader" makes me recall these conversations with My Beloved. I sure was ready to behave just as abominably - and it is abominable behavior - so I cannot judge Mr. Romney or Ms. Brewer. I only hope they, too, feel that twinge in their moral fiber that signals the moment when I started being more bad than good.

Me and Hil' on the hill

Full of Sound and Fury, Signifying Nothing

2012-01-23T20:57:00.003-05:00

This blog is supposed to be a friendly place where I keep in touch with my friends and family. I try hard to abstain from overt ranting about topics that might offend. Somedays it is harder than others. Without expressing any particular viewpoint, here is a list of recent topics/events about which I have been sounding off at length:

Paula Deen's diabetes and her paid sponsor
Customer service on USAirways vs. United vs. Southwest
The gas mileage on a 2000 Honda Civic DX compared to a 2012 version of the same
Smoking at work
Alec Baldwin and the use of "electronic devices" on planes
TSA and the monetization of safety

(can you tell I've spent a lot of time on planes lately?)

Freire's critical consciousness of education and social science theory in general
Childhood nutrition and obesity
The current revisioning of the DSM

/end rant

GPOYW

2012-01-11T10:40:00.000-05:00

My new slippers from Christmas.

I must have been a very, very good girl because these things are money!

*aaaaaah*

Vacation Update

2011-12-29T20:27:00.001-05:00

Vacation accomplishments:

volunteered to get bumped and scored $800 in flight vouchers (whoot!)
ate myself stupid on 1# of hangar steak and a stick of sweet cream butter
worked 6hrs (whatever)
did yoga with my sister
went to the children's museum

And, currently, working on my first claymation motion picture!

Cramming

2011-12-21T18:35:00.012-05:00

Lesson learned as an adult, #311: A week's vacation from work is not really "getting paid for not working for 40 hours". It's 80 hours of work crammed into one 40-hour week.

http://thispublicaddress.com/tPA4/images/04_07/gutmann1.jpg

GOPYM

2011-12-18T22:42:00.001-05:00

These are for My Beloved.

You make my heart melt.

Merry Christmas, my true love.

Reality

2011-12-14T18:48:00.000-05:00

What I envisioned in my mind for my trip to Chicago:

This photo of Chicago is courtesy of TripAdvisor

What I actually saw:

"Sue" replica from inside the airport next to Jamba Juice.

*sigh*

Mine Control

2011-12-11T20:21:00.000-05:00

I came across this story while avoiding my homework the other day about unexploded ordnances in Germany. (Why are they called ordnances? Anyone?) Isn't that just a horrible story? "600 tonnes of unexploded material discovered every year"? How is it possible to do any city planning with that kind of threat underground? Here in the city of brotherly affection, they need special permissions, zoning, and preparations to protect the discovery of any hidden mementos from our nation's birth. Ah, such simpler times, the Revolutionary War. The worst that can happen is breaking some household relic that Washington kept on his nightstand, not wiping out a square mile of 21st century infrastructure.

Does Germany get to bill the US for the cost of disposal, including transporting hospital patients to safer distances? Should they? Discuss.

U.S. Army Corps of Engineers

Had Me at Hello

2011-12-09T22:24:00.000-05:00

Goosebumps! I am *such* a sucker for The Fairy Tale.
And, no, that's not a double entendre. I mean the True Love kind, you boob.

Windy City

2011-12-07T21:23:00.000-05:00

Chicago promises to be slightly less, ahem, welcoming at this time of the year. Regardless, I was/am/will be really looking forward to gettin' me some Garrett's while I'm there for 24hrs. If only the client could make up their minds about which cold and windy day I'm needed at their site, exactly!

Can you spot me and My Beloved?

GPOYM

2011-12-05T23:19:00.000-05:00

Twin #2, like me, hates turkey.

So, for Thanksgiving, we both got our dinner out of a bottle, instead.

*Specificity of Association

2011-12-02T19:40:00.006-05:00

Since you asked...

There are a few rules to follow when trying to prove causality. Say, for example, I observe that it rains every time I wear my pink suede shoes.

Is there a causal link between wearing pink suede shoes and the weather?

This guy, Sir Austin Bradford Hill, put together a list of associations that should be checked when trying to prove causality. These rules (they're called Bradford Hills Criteria, btw) are:

Temporality

how quickly after I put the shoes on does it start to cloud up?
This is not a big requirement so much anymore, either, depending on what is under discussion. The temporal association between smoking and lung cancer, for example, is so disparate to be almost nil.

Strength

a mathematical measurement of correlation

Biologic gradient (aka dose-response relationship)

does it rain all day if I wear the shoes all day? does it only rain for half the day if I wear one pink suede shoe and one sneaker?

Consistency

does it happen every time or only some times?

Biologic plausibility

This would be something like "the color pink is on a light frequency that attracts water droplets and suede makes water droplets condense," e.g., a scientific reason for why pink shoes make it rain

Specificity

does it always rain or does it sometimes get foggy or even snow?
This is considered the weakest criteria b/c there are lots of cause and effects that don't seem to make any sense, especially in biology. For example, a concussion will make you cranky (i.e., physical injury results in behavioral symptoms)

Experimental evidence (aka effect of removing the exposure):

does it stop raining if I take them off?

Alternate hypothesis or analogy

is there any other possible explanation?

Coherence

is there anything else like this in the known universe that operates similarly?

Wrong Answer

2011-11-30T12:33:00.004-05:00

I got a few questions wrong on the quiz for my epidemiology class. That's nothing new.

The quiz is administered during the first 15" of class and we get them back, graded, at the lunch break. I spent the break reviewing all my wrong answers. There was one that troubled me because I could not recall ever having seen the right answer. When reviewing my text book for where the material was covered, I discovered this:

Specificity of Association is the weakest proof of causality*. Says so right there in black and white. Clearly, a week ago, I thought this was so significant that I highlighted the damn thing. I still got the wrong answer. Grrrr.

Lately, I would attribute this phenomena of knowing the material but not being able to recall it part of "the memory loss." However, I'm comfortable with writing this off to bad study habits!

City of Love

2011-11-28T15:49:00.000-05:00

Occupy Broad Street

Good old William Penn atop City Hall

The gathering storm

Oh, right. That Explains It.

2011-11-25T09:18:00.000-05:00

All my friends in the "gifted" program are laughing their heads off right now at this one.

Giving Thanks

2011-11-24T15:13:00.032-05:00

Earlier this week, a most beloved family member (are there any other kinds?) was hit by a drunk driver while crossing the street. We got the call at dinner time that afternoon from the emergency room. Except for disfiguring scarring, she will be fine. I am so overwhelmed with gratitude that I don't know how to begin to pay karma back. The thought of her twin babies, just 3 months old, left motherless had me gasping, and the image of her husband of only three years left widowed was more horror than my mind could hold.

My heart even goes out to the man who hit her. Someone who is drunk at 3pm on a school day with the poor judgement to drive and then (almost) leave the scene of an accident is someone who is not in a good place. (And that place is about to get so much worse).

Where ever you are now, celebrating this time of family togetherness, pause to drink it in. Life would not be the same without it. Whatever issues there may be, at least no one is incarcerated or hospitalized. Saying "i love you" is as easy as a phone call.

And for Pete's sake, don't let anyone drink and drive.

http://www.picturesdepot.com/wallpapers/4797/happy+thanksgiving.html

GPOYW

2011-11-23T11:16:00.000-05:00

I heart FaceTime.

San Fran Cheesy, Redux

2011-11-21T11:40:00.001-05:00

I'll be back in SFO in January this year. I squirreled away some extra time off so I can make a long weekend of it, but...

San Francisco in January? Anyone have ideas what can be done mid-winter in southern California? (ahem, without My Beloved.)

For Erin E.

2011-11-20T15:13:00.000-05:00

Hudson - Against The Grain from Dropbear on Vimeo.

Stuff like this makes me think of you :)

NaBloPoMo

2011-11-18T11:37:00.000-05:00

Well, shucks, it's the middle of November and I just remembered about this. Blurg. This doesn't look like the usual page for the "prompts of the day." Anybody have the 'real' link? Please post in comments!

GOPYW

2011-11-16T11:35:00.000-05:00

This be where I'm livin' from now until the end of the year.

*sigh*

The Life Span of a Bad Idea

2011-11-14T19:15:00.005-05:00

As a project manager, I spend a lot of my time "herding cats" as they say: corralling Information Holders with Decision Makers into one room so they can tell Operationalizers what to do to make it all happen. My favorite part of this exercise is when the combination is just right, and the team starts to feed off itself and gets really creative about problem solving. Depending on the meeting, it's my job to moderate and add gasoline or cold water as needed. I always struggle with the cold water part. When I hear hooves, I think "zebra" not "horse" and am deeply sympathetic towards not-obvious solutions. Still, when it's time to call it quits on a bad idea, it's usually because of some operational issue (costs too much, lack the technology, not enough manpower), and not because of anything personal or political.

For school, I was reading about the yellow fever epidemic in Philadelphia in 1793. The American Revolution had been supported by France and Louis XVI, but when he was executed a number of people from France and the French Indies immigrated to the US and into Philadelphia...right as the epidemic was gaining steam. This led a two disparate beliefs about the source of the fever. Federalists (pro-Hamilton, anti-French) believed it was an imported disease (i.e., brought by French immigrants). Republicans (pro-Jefferson, pro-French) believed it had a local cause due to poor sanitation (think "miasmata" and "effluvia"). At an impasse, actions were take on behalf of both theories: immigrants were quarantined and the city organized better sanitation. Win-win, right?

There were also two schools of medical treatment for the fever: bleeding + mercury or quinine bark + wine. The bleeding treatment was championed by a preeminent Federalist doctor. Hamilton, in a misguided attempt to show his support behind his doctor friend, politicized the treatment issue with an op-ed piece very complementary of the doctor and the treatment. Suddenly, it became a Federalist thing. When other doctors tried to declaim the bleeding treatment, they were labeled as pro-Republican and anti-Federalist. The problem with this conflict was that the bleeding treatment required the doctor to "draw an amount of blood which we know today to be in excess of the quantity possessed by most people."* But, because it had become a political issue and was no longer a medical issue, doctors and patients couldn't step back from the bleeding theory or switch to quinine bark without signaling disloyalty towards Federalists and favor for the Republicans. Dumb, right?

It got me thinking about the life span of bad ideas. What's the tipping point between exploring an idea and beating a dead horse? (<-to bring back the equine metaphor) When have you persisted in something after it was out of favor (poor fashion decisions, excluded)?

*Pernick, MS. (1972) "Politics, Parties, and Pstielence: epidemic Yellow Fever in Philadelphia and the Rise of the First Party System." William and Mary Quarterly, 29(4): 559-586.

18 Minutes of Free Think

2011-11-11T23:54:00.006-05:00

I am not claustrophobic, but I have had one or two panic attacks. When I scheduled my MRI, and, again, on the day of the imaging, I was asked: are you claustrophobic? "No," I confidently replied, "I'm not." As I kid I used to seek out small spaces to feel cuddled. (At one point I slept in my closet for a few days...with all the clothes still inside!) It wasn't until I was older and saw that Frontline special about the fire in the London tube that I ever second guessed going into an enclosed space. Still, I never had an MRI of my head before and hadn't given much conscious thought to the experience. Unfortunately, it turns out, since everyone made such a big deal about being claustrophobic, what was lurking in my subconscious was an impression of the procedure as akin to getting buried alive.

As the technician walked me down the hall, he casually mentioned that I was going to get an injection. "They told you about that, right?" he asked.

"No," I answered, "no, they did not."

I believe I've made allusion here before about how my blood pressure plummets at the sight of blood or suggestion of anything that could possibly bring blood forth from its happy place within the human body. Combine my mental images of getting buried alive + cue up the "Juliane fainting, episode #219" tape and I was primed to successfully fulfill their worst fears as a claustrophobe-denier. As the carriage started to slide into the tunnel, I closed my eyes and tried to breath normally. I kept my eyes closed, thinking if I didn't know how tightly I was entombed, I would feel freer. Yet, I could feel the trapped animal straining in my chest and my breathing starting to stutter. "Do I press the 'get me out of here!' button? Can I talk myself down from this?"

My sister loves to tell stories (she's a brilliant writer). She makes them up and encourages her kids to create tales, too. To distract her kids from injury or dullness, she makes them tell her a story. She'll prime the telling with a character, setting, or event, and then they'll run with it. As I struggled with my inner dialog ("You are not really claustrophobic, Juliane! "Oh, yeah? Then why am I hyperventilating?!"), I thought of her.

And I was stopped panicking. For the 18 minute procedure, I thought about my sister and her family and how we'll all be together again, soon. Even through the injection, I kept it together. While I won't say it was bliss, there certainly is a power in holding on to a happy thought.

(I can't wait to see my niece and nephew and tell them this story!)

GPOYW

2011-11-09T18:38:00.000-05:00

Me and Dr. Robert Sharrar, co-worker/friend/mentor at Drexel MPH invocation

There's No Pill for What You Got

2011-11-07T18:06:00.003-05:00

I had an MRI to rule out brain lesions as an explanation for the progressive cognitive decline. The good news is they didn't find anything (badum bum! come on, Dad, I totally set you up for that one!). Laying in the extremely loud, extremely claustrophobic space, I tried to fall in love with the sound of the machine. The technician only said 1000x to hold still, but the thing was so loud and would start and stop that I startled every time it got going again.

"Ma'am, it's important that you hold still."

"Ma'am, please, try not to move your head."

I'm so weird sometimes. When checking into the reception for the procedure, I had to fill out three pages of questionnaire: do you have a pacemaker? have you had an MRI before? what are your allergies? I absolutely bristle at these things. I panic, literally, that these bits of paper covered with such personal information will get lost in the shuffle (which has happened) or that my records will not be kept confidential (has also happened). I am so overwrought by this questionnaire that I won't even answer the first question: why are you having this procedure today? "It's none of their GD business!" my internal voice shouts, "They should already know this! It's in the d*mn chart!" These nosy people, who are only trying to help, are the enemy. And, yet, I'll thankfully pour all my fears and last health detail into a woman with whom I've worked for only 6 mos.

At the grocery, I am that woman who patiently waits behind the frazzled parent and screaming child in the checkout line. I try to engage the young child and keep her distracted so her parent can just, please, have one quiet moment to find the coupons and clubsaver card. Yet, when I call my benefits company, I am already spitting and screaming if I have to repeat my user ID more than once.

Schizophrenia is detectable by MRI. I'm just not sure they were looking for it.

Storm Clouds

2011-11-04T17:51:00.000-04:00

There's weather on the horizon...

Between now and the winter holidays, I have 5 x 4-6 page papers and 1 x 10 page policy recommendation due, plus two finals. Up to now, I've finally found my rhythm with juggling the work and the school. I have planned for this onslaught and my weekends and nights from now until then are booked.

What I have not planned for is the surgery and subsequent short term disability leave for a co-worker beginning next week through the end of the year. All her clients have deliverables due either the last week of December or first week of January.

I'm warning you now, there's weather coming. Best stock up on provisions and batten down the hatches.

GOPYW

2011-11-02T19:57:00.000-04:00

Me and two kewpie dolls

Last game of the season for Camden Riversharks

GPOYW

2011-10-26T22:57:00.000-04:00

Me and love-related relatives at Twin #1 christening.

Eclectic Tastes

2011-10-25T22:25:00.001-04:00

These days, my bedside reading looks like this:

Health Behavior and Health Education (school)
The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner (school antidote)
Five Chiefs (school antidote antidote)
iPad (so my hands never need touch library binding again)

Good Luck with That

2011-10-24T22:17:00.001-04:00

From today's NYT: "MTA Trash Plan: Remove Subway Station Bins"

A few years ago when we were in Japan, our tour guide regaled us with a story about waste management in the big cities. She said many people eat their meals outdoors on their lunch breaks, but this resulted in the lunchtime refuse quickly overflowing the trash cans and blowing around the town. To my way of thinking, the solution would be to add more trash cans. The Japanese? Not so much. Instead, they got *rid* of the trash cans. Now, with no nearby place to dispose of it, the lunchtimers had to cart their trash back home/to the office/the car for disposal. It was a success! No more overflowing trash bins or wax wrappers tumbling into the gutters.

Now, it seems NYC is trying a similar experiment. I think its a noble exercise and wonder how they calculated the number of trash cans to remove. According to this article, they pulled them from two busy stations, but local purveyors are complaining that trash is being displaced into their area. I think, to be successful, there must be wholesale removal. All trash cans, gone! City wide! Who's with me?!

News Flash for MTA & me: NYC is not Japan.

Image from http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_4SufQJeNigU/TTkGBuOAHsI/AAAAAAA...

Schism

2011-10-19T23:07:00.001-04:00

When I was a teenager, I felt fairly composed and mature for my age. I also felt like I was strong in my opinions, reasoned, and that they would be immutable with age. I had a recent conversation with My Beloved about a Frontline or PBS program he had seen on Facebook privacy and teens. In the program, teens went on a trip to NYC and got loaded on the train ride. There were ER visits and much of the escapade was video taped and posted. One parent, on the PTA, found out about it and sent an email to all the other PTA parents to alert them to the goings on and encourage a conversation with their teen. My Beloved asked if I thought she was right to do this?

In answering, I am aware of how differently I see myself now from my younger self. Yes, I thought she was right and would likely have done the same. It's almost as if these generations, parent and child, are at war and, like POWs, each is obligated to harass the enemy as much as possible. As a teen, I operated in strict pursuit of accomplishing my own objectives. If those aligned with others' goals, so much the better. If not, well, we each had our own destiny to pursue. I imagine I would feel the same, now, but from the perspective of a parent. My objective would be to protect and educate, without negotiation.

We don't have these theoretical kinds of conversations about parenting often. However, each time I am reminded how grateful I am to have a choice about being a parent, and how blessed I am to have been raised by people better than me.

I Got the Flu for My Birthday

2011-10-14T16:19:00.003-04:00

For the first time in almost 40 (!) years, I spent my birthday sick. Laid up with the flu, in fact. Still, when you're blessed like I am, a runny nose and eyes plus head congestion 2ft thick can't stop a good time and a fantastic celebration. All my family called and sang happy birthday. (Seriously, is there anything more heartbreaking than small child voices calling "we miss you!" from 2K miles away into an answering machine?) Next, we ate tapas. Then, My Beloved took me to a Liszt concert, which was phen.nom.men.al! The pieces performed were written decades, some 40 years, apart, but Mr. Cohen arranged them into a beautiful, seamless emotional landscape. It was such a delight!

Here's a pic of me with my BFF at her birthday party (we're 2 days apart!):

Two Libras!

Two Tramps In Mud Time

2011-10-11T21:15:00.000-04:00

I've recently discovered APM's "Dinner Party Downloads", which are light and entertaining and the perfect thing to listen to whilst smiling politely at idiots with road rage. Tonight, after leaving the office after 7:30pm (again!), I heard this excerpt of Robert Frost's "Two Tramps in Mud Time" for the first time:

The sun was warm but the wind was chill.
You know how it is with an April day
When the sun is out and the wind is still,
You're one month on in the middle of May.
But if you so much as dare to speak,
A cloud comes over the sunlit arch,
A wind comes off a frozen peak,
And you're two months back in the middle of March.

I'm not a poet (and I know it!), but I love this. So true! So poetic! And it rhymes! We have just entered that part of the year where I'd be crazy to deny that Fall is upon me. There is no squinting of my eyes or cleaning of the windshield which can correct the new colors on the trees. And it is Dark dark at 7:30pm, now - no fooling myself that it's just cloudy or an early sunset - so late nights at the office really make me feel like I've missed the whole day. Tonight, when I heard this on the podcast, I felt like it'd been chosen for me on this day when I'm in this mood.

The universe is feelin' me.

That Is So Not a Role Model

2011-10-07T21:45:00.001-04:00

Driving home from school tonight, I was caught in the slo-mo traffic of a beautiful Friday afternoon. A beautiful coupe Mercedes was weaving in and out of the four-lane highway like idiots will do sometimes when they don't accept the laws of motion + herd mentality. So, I passed, and was passed by, this gorgeous, shiny black machine several times. Finally, I noticed his license plate: DROP OUT. I laughed out loud. His driving bravado matched with the car, for sure, but what better way to stick it to us working stiffs who follow the rules of success (HS>college>working stiff>wealth), not to mention the rules of the road.

I sang this the whole rest of the way home:

You So Get Me

2011-10-04T22:51:00.000-04:00

Last night discussing Jane Eyre (cuz that's how we roll), My Beloved re-told the story of the time in college when we went toe-to-toe with his lit prof at the incomprehensibility of Jane choosing what was proper over love. (I suppose this is where English Majors and book lovers divide: you either get the straight-laced Victorian culture or you don't.) But, as he explained it, true love is not a convenience, not a choice. (My Beloved would want me to say here that his is not the same as saying it gives a person carte blanche to behave like a cad. Cheating, temptation, etc. are all still wrong and cannot be excused.) Yet when presented with True Love, you must love back and be in love in spite of all else. It is a law of nature, like gravity, and must be obeyed. (Think Buttercup and how she had "less choice than the sun rising in the East".)

I was going to write that it would've been fun to have seen My Beloved's 19-year-old self arguing the philosophy and law of love with an honors college professor. But I bet he looked a lot like he did last night, holding my cold feet in his lap, reminding me once again how very lucky I am to have found someone who believes in fairy tales like me.

Now accepting suggestions for 2011's pumpkin carving!

2011-10-01T11:26:00.000-04:00

Please leave your thoughts in the comments!

Past years:

Napolean Dynamite
Scout
Count Olaf (Lemony Snickett series)
Random Peanuts characters

Warm Spot

2011-09-29T23:27:00.001-04:00

Today, while working from home, I stepped into the carpeted bedroom onto a square of sunlight-warmed floor. My breath caught remembering how, every now and again, we'd step on a spot where Scout had been sleeping and be surprised by the warm, lasting imprint of her. Our house is so empty without her.

For Beaner

2011-09-29T23:24:00.001-04:00

So, yeah, its been a bit of a lockdown here on the old folks farm. A whirlwind honeymoon in Chicago (<-loved it, moving there one day), then into the throes of school, and opportunities galore at work that I find myself raising my hand for...all great and very bad at the same time. (Except Chicago which was nothing other than awesome and romantic and a new 100 all time best memory with My Beloved.)

We've met these little people:

new Irish cousins

And this set of lungs, who had me with her first chin quiver:

And we spent some time with the local fauna getting inspiration for a new 7 Mile Design job:

But now it is [almost] all this all the time. Good stuff, really, but, still, it's school! I don't know what I was thinking to wait so long to get an advanced degree, but I'm sure glad I didn't wait any longer.

Descent of the Dragonflies

2011-09-11T20:14:00.000-04:00

And Then There Were None (Credits Left)

2011-09-07T21:12:00.000-04:00


	Attempted	Earned	GPA Hours	Quality Points	GPA
Current Term:	6.000	6.000	6.000	24.00	4.00
Cumulative:	33.000	33.000	33.000	131.01	3.97
Transfer:	0.000	0.000	0.000	0.00	0.00
Overall:	33.000	33.000	33.000	131.01	3.97

This concludes my foray into the social sciences.

Next up on the 5-yr plan? A Masters in Public Health! Beginning this Friday....

More for Blake

2011-09-06T21:57:00.000-04:00

Lincoln Park Zoo, Chicago, IL
Amur Snow Leopard /awesome!

For Blake

2011-08-30T23:48:00.000-04:00

See how the wind moves the water from the fountain? There was no "safe" place to stand! Is that why they call it the "windy" city?

GOPYW

2011-08-16T23:26:00.000-04:00

Me and Mt. Fuji.

You know how we do.

Falling in Love With the Rain

2011-08-14T20:58:00.000-04:00

a double rainbow as seen from my commute home

Garden Update

2011-08-10T22:13:00.001-04:00

This right here is what has been making a salad bar out of my garden. Nature is about to get a lot redder in tooth in claw, if you catch my meaning..

Survivors.

Wow. The video above is loaded through bloggers engine. Below is the youtube resolution. Score 1 for Youtube!

Wordless Monday

2011-08-08T20:06:00.000-04:00

I Will Fall in Love With Everything That Annoys Me

2011-08-03T01:24:00.001-04:00

I love love love this premise. I first heard this on the radio and confess it is much more powerful if you just listen and don't watch. Particularly when the violins hit.

In Which I Continue to Mature

2011-07-13T21:50:00.001-04:00

I have finally accepted that any task I need to get done at home in the evenings after a relentless day of work will be prefaced with a solid 60" of total brainless crap and self-indulgence. Much like gorging on Snickers and Skittles before sitting down to a dinner of undressed salad and water. No matter how committed I am on my commute home to "hit the ground running" or how carefully I plan out my moves (drop bag at door, kiss Beloved, change into grubs, boot up computer, turn on drip irrigation, research for 40", turn off drip irrigation, dinner...), I always lose an hour to mindless mind stretching...like blog posts :)

For Once, We Experience the City in Which We Live

2011-07-05T22:54:00.002-04:00

Flowers in the Attic

2011-06-22T22:05:00.000-04:00

Tomorrow morning at 5am, My Beloved and I have a hot date in the attic. Literally. We're doing the last push to get the new insulation down. It's gotta be over 95* up there now and at least 92* outside. Two words: butt sweat. No matter how much you're in love, that's just plain not attractive. I'll do it, though, and gladly, if it means we can finally (!) turn the air on. My fingers and toes have been the size of little sausages since Memorial Day.

In other news, my work on my independent study is going swimmingly with only two meetings under my belt. See, it's all about finding something that is interesting to me. I can't imagine the "rhetoric of defeat in science" holding my attention for long, but for the next 11+ weeks (or until we've exhausted all publication options or have had it accepted for publishing) it will be enough. Of course, this has spurned yet another round of fantasizing what my life would be like as an academician and wistful longings for the days of gentlemen (or gentlewoman) scholars.

GPO my garden returns

One of My Favorite Vacation Pictures

2011-06-13T22:43:00.001-04:00

This is the closest any image of My Beloved will get to the intarweb. Isn't he dreamy? /sigh

We Pause Here For Reflection

2011-06-13T22:41:00.001-04:00

We've been on a definite high note here of late:

an A in both my classes
solid "she's the best!" feedback from a client on a project I was sent to rescue
more sore throat spontaneously resolved
My Beloved's been on a tear with work
the hot weather broke so I'm sleeping like a baby
two weeks of trashy novel time before school starts again.

Of course, tonight we received an $800 medical bill b/c the in-network doctor sent blood vials to an out-of-network lab. Obviously, the purpose of this was to make me appreciate the many things listed above. Dear Karma, I get it, but $800 is a bit steep don't you think?

In Which I Lose My Mind for 30 Seconds

2011-06-10T23:58:00.000-04:00

We recently stayed overnight at a friend's home in Connecticut. It is a lovely home: very traditional from the outside but redesigned on the inside to be full of unexpected architecture. The house is decorated with an amazing collection of unique art and photos. My Beloved and I were taking mental snapshots of the bookshelves, the picture frames, the color scheme.

In the morning, I lay in bed imagining how I could incorporate one of these design elements into my own home. But, for a full 30 seconds, I could not conjure forth one mental image of my own home. My own home, in which I've lived almost nine years! Of which I am so ridiculously proud, thanks to My Beloved's efforts to make it our own! At first, it felt like one of those moments we've all experienced when you can't recall a person's name. But as the seconds ticked on and images of bedrooms and living rooms flashed in my mind (Hawaii, my SIL's, my parents'), I knew this was worse. It was the lost feeling experienced as a small child when I grabbed a stranger's hand mistaking it for my mother's. I thought of waking My Beloved, but how would I explain it? I don't know where I live. I don't know how to get home. I tried picturing where I sleep at night, where I eat, thinking the memory of the action would provide the environment. Nothing. Nothing but glasslike panic.

And then, boom, I was able to recall a photograph taken by my MIL of the front of our home when we first moved in. From there, I was able to re-build the interior in my mind. This was four days ago and I am still shaken by the experience.

Oh, wicked senility! Be quick with your dirty work!

What Were You Doing in 8th Grade?

2011-06-01T23:48:00.000-04:00

Scripp's Semi-finalists. Go look at the photos of these kids. Are they not the definition of "precious" or what? Ugh! Their anxiety is so clear! I particularly love the girl who is using her name plate to mime writing the word out.

Go #214! Reprezent'n, girlfriend! Look at you all tough with "hukilau"! Rock on!

Planning the Future

2011-05-31T21:26:00.000-04:00

I want more creativity in my career.

I love, love socializing with my fellow graduate students and talking about rhetoric and ethics and testing and...you get the picture. I'm not swapping potato salad recipes; I like the discourse. I like sitting with a pile of peer-reviewed research and pulling it all together in my own review/white paper.

I like working on something that isn't the staid, dry, exact science I've been practicing for so long.

I like playing my ukulele with my BIL.

Ugh. The desperate, keening need for change can be so exhausting sometimes, no?

Let Me Know When You've Had Enough, Part III

2011-05-27T23:49:00.000-04:00

I rock the Richard Scary book and get in a good squeeze!

Please notice his arm draped lovingly over his sister as they eat breakfast. /heart snap

Our orthodontist would be proud.

Hammock + Hunk + Hawaii = HEAVEN

This is my face beseeching My Beloved to fold the country in half and put PA closer to OR. (He'll find a way. The guy can control the weather; he can fold space.)

Let Me Know When You've Had Enough, Part II

2011-05-27T23:42:00.000-04:00

Na Pali Trail

Let Me Know When You've Had Enough, Part I

2011-05-27T23:24:00.000-04:00

My feet on the North Shore

Now you see them...

Now you don't!

Suntan Lotion

2011-05-25T21:43:00.000-04:00

It was a perfect pre-summer evening, tonight.

My Beloved and I ate homemade pizza on the back porch. My Lonicera has just come into bloom and we are bathed in a baby-soft, summer smell. It reminds me of the smell of suntan lotion.

My Gruss an Aachen is in full bloom, loving the additional sunshine since we lost an oak last season. It smells a little citrusy, it's pink, and I love it.

A Belated Blog Birthday Post To My Beautiful Sister

2011-05-24T21:54:00.000-04:00

Her husband is a lucky guy! :)

Tanned & Sated

2011-05-24T00:05:00.001-04:00

It was like a honeymoon every day.

Except with my parents and half my family there.

Go: http://www.gohawaii.com/kauai. You'll thank me.

Vacation Grinch

2011-05-21T06:03:00.000-04:00

Know that scene at the end of The Grinch Who Stole Christmas when his heart swells and breaks the boundary of the xray? That's what happens to my heart when I get to see my family. My youngest nephew was ailing this trip and spent a good chunck today curled on my chest. My niece wrote me love letters, and my oldest nephew was patient and doting to the youngest. He's really matured since I saw him last.

Now, picture what happens when I have to say good-bye to my lovely ones for an indeterminate period of time. It's like in the cartoons when Bugs pours aspic on the antagonist's tongue. My heart just shrivels.

Vacation is a State of Mind

2011-05-13T23:43:00.000-04:00

Technically, I've been on vacation since 6:30pm on Thursday. I haven't slept much since then, eaten a real meal, or actually stopped working. However, the calendar says I'm on vacation and I can feel it in my gut: no stomach-dropping OMG that I forgot something/am currently forgetting about a meeting/already late for a deadline.

I am crazy for lists, but, in spite of my preparedness, have left the house w/o two important accoutrements. One is my glasses, which I obviously won't be able to pick up en route and may give me a blistering headache on the 12hr plane ride trying to watch movies off the iPad. Know what? Just means I'll need to drink more and blame the poor eyesight on being drunk! If blogger decides to behave, I'll post some pictures.

A Spry Young Man

2011-05-05T13:28:00.000-04:00

All little girls love their daddy!

And grandsons love their grandpas, too!

My beloved father celebrated his birthday with us last night at the most whacked out Mexican restaurant. (How can you be a Tequila bar, spend 20" describing all the wonderful drinks offered, and then come back to say that you're out of Tequila?! It boggles the mind.) In honor of his birthday, here are top 10 things I love about my dad:

Wicked generosity streak
Decisive and unhesitating drive to action
Super smart with one of those encyclopedic memories
Laughs easily with a warm, infectious "ha! ha!"
Firm grasp of reality and doesn't waste a second on regret
Crackerjack fisherman and takes me with him if I ask him nicely :)
Loves my mother the way she deserves to be honored
Sends me postcards from all his world travels so I can pick and choose where I want to visit when I grow up, too
Has not one iota of good luck. Not one. Every success is his alone. Success = 99% hard work+ 1% luck? Not Dad. 100% hard work. Doesn't bemoan or question his lot (see #2 and #5 above).
He can't carry a tune in a bucket, but that boy's got rhythm and can move!

A Story Without Tragedy

2011-05-03T22:25:00.000-04:00

The family has had a series of hard challenges lately, on both sides. Cancer, a tragic accident, undiagnosed chronic illness. Even at work, a close colleague was told last Friday that her husband "doesn't have very long." It has been a time for gratefulness for our personal health and general access to [arguably] the best medical care possible. So, tonight's post will be without tragedy b/c we could all use a little respite for a few beats.

Tonight, I was vindicated. A classmate and I collaborated on an in-class assignment. We finished early, so we were just gabbing. I shared that I was taking two classes this term. She made a face and asked if I was experiencing any - how did she put it? - "ill effects." I told her that, other than the chronic edginess that makes me startle and the slightest, I was holding up OK. [It's true. My poor Beloved has taking to calling out "I'm walking down the stairs!" or "I'm coming around the corner!" Sometimes it helps, sometimes I still startle. He just gawks at me and shouts "You know I live here too, right?! Why are you surprised to see me?!"] She said she developed chronic acid reflux the year she took two courses per quarter. And she's, like, easily 10yrs younger than me!

Oh! and speaking of younger, the prof tonight told a story of a work experience he had in 1989 when Quark first came out. The undergrad next to me snickered under her breath, "I was one in 1989."

I loath smug youth.

Show Me the Data

2011-04-26T21:09:00.000-04:00

I am challenging myself to not check out of one of my classes. The focus of the course is on how to design documents, and we're learning a lot about how to do that. For my money, however, I want to know which design elements to include to effect change and comprehension in the reader. I understand no one will read my document if the colors, font, etc are off putting. However, show. me. the data. that says complementary colors hold attention twice as long as contrasting colors.

I sent the professor an email with an article form the NYT that summarized a recent paper in Cognition about this very thing. I've even brought it up in class, now, because I think it is an important caveat to what we're learning.

Now? Now, I've moved to the last row of the class. I'm trying to reconcile myself that what this guy is selling, I'm not buying but it's still worth my time (and money) to attend.

How have you challenged yourself to be patient?

Want Milk With That?

2011-04-20T20:42:00.001-04:00

The past few weeks have been increasingly challenging as my school work ramps up. The assignments are stimulating and not overburdensome, but they do take some time.

I spend much of my time worrying about time.

I'm not sure if it is a function of being old(er) or pathetically out of shape (or both), but small things take more out of me. Earlier this week, I spent part of the day at the client's site. The few hours of being "on" just wiped me out. I mean my tank was on E. Not half-full. Not low. E. As with the school work, I love interacting with clients, but there is a price to pay. And it is higher than it once was. Like my laptop, I take longer to recharge than I used to, run down faster, and make a lot of loud, grumbly noises of protest.

Tonight is a beautiful evening: high 70's, light wind, glowing sunset and all of spring just bursting in color. I picked fresh arugula and spinach from my garden, ate some leftover pasta, and while feeling completely put upon, tried to relax by the TV. I got caught up in a show on the Independent Lens about garbage pickers in Brazil. They "work" at the dump collecting recyclables, which they trade in for money. All of the women interviewed for the show spoke of the pride they feel in this honest work and, in spite of the smell, were grateful they had an option besides prostitution.

And here I sit, feeling so beleaguered by my homework, while I eat fresh produce, a home-cooked meal, and ponder what my well-stocked kitchen might contain for a little dessert. I think I'll have a slice of humble pie.

Simple Pleasures

2011-04-17T15:50:00.000-04:00

dirt from my garden
sweet, spicy radish seedlings (I planted too many seeds and had to thin this weekend)
a torrential downpour and giddy security of my car
sun-warmed patches of carpet
homemade pizza
a stem of Erlicheer perfuming the whole bedroom
the sounds of the teenager next door doing her best American Idol impressions
anticipation of the next episode of Upstairs/Downstairs tonight
getting homework done

Family of Athletes, cont'd

2011-04-13T22:28:00.000-04:00

My older sister and her husband have just returned from a skiing trip to No Man's Land, accessible only by helicopter and something called a Cat. (She says "Cat" like I should know the word, and - as a little sister determined to be as smart as her older sister - I'm not about to reveal my ignorance. We live in different worlds. I'm sure she is just as confused when I use words like "traffic jam".)

There are some great pictures of her to be found here:

http://fyidesigndept.com/snowboarding/baldface-session-2-cat-1-2011

I would post them here, too, but last night's lecture was "Tirade Against Plagiarism, ver16" and I'm playing it safe.

Check out the photo of the three women on the bar (third row down). I'm fairly certain that the booty on the left is my older sister.

In Session

2011-04-11T21:54:00.003-04:00

I enrolled in two courses this term and, boy howdy, I sure am creating some space under my shrink wrap. One of the courses is "writing intensive" and the other is just plain cool and awesome and let's me work with a not-for-profit and call it a class assignment.

I am also, simultaneously, trying to lay-in some serious ground work on the independent study I want to do over the summer with the professor for the plain cool and awesome class. We/I am going to try to develop a short writing assignment I completed for another of his courses from two terms ago into a full paper. At the time, he had encouraged me to consider publishing it and offered to supervise my efforts as part of an independent study. But work, and winter, and oh-my-gosh-that-will-be-so-much-work! However, since I'm trying to "create space" to prepare for the second Master's program I'll be starting in the fall, I decided to go for it. When I approached him last week, he commented that he was really disappointed I hadn't been more enthusiastic about it at the time b/c he thought it was such a good idea.

While it is still just as much work as it was before and nothing else in my life has changed besides the weather, the more I think about writing this paper, the more excited I am. How cool would it be to be published in multiple genres: molecular biology and rhetoric!

Truly, my genius knows no bounds.

Sir Real

2011-04-06T19:15:00.000-04:00

Last night I slept better than I have in days, thanks to the cold snap (35*F?!) and one too many blankets on the bed. This morning, I awoke completely cramped and exhausted like I'd spent the whole day prior in too much fresh air and physical activity. I spent the morning studying some documents in preparation for an 11am lunch with my team and a 1pm bid defense with a client. A relaxed 20" commute into the city in which I rehearsed my introduction, and then a tense 10" of parking. [insert gratitude here for the Nicest Parking Attendant in Center City] This was one of many bid presentations on this work so the client cut to the chase. We sat at the foot of a stage, seven in a row, with what felt like thirty of Them arrayed in a u-shaped table before us. The acoustics were abysmal and the staff responsible for transferring the microphone from speaker to speaker could not keep up. Rapid fire, the questions came. I was in a deodorant commercial. Yet all my razor's edge anxiety was for naught; I wasn't called on to say one word. Dismissed, we regrouped at the bar and I reminded myself that 3pm on a Wednesday is not the time to cash it in. Friendly pats on the back, I dashed back to my car (still there! not vandalized!), but left my brain in the office where it regretted the unresponsive body trapped in the driver's seat. Finally, at home, the panic that woke me up spontaneously at 6am took hold. Client deliverable for 10+ data tables due by close of business. (What is "close of business"? Is that 5pm? 5:30pm? Midnight?) The time is 3:58
4:39
5:19
5:55

I am done. For better or worse, the email is sent. Beer. I need beer like a fish needs water. A quick drive to the local distributor and -what ho!- a case (a CASE!) of Blue Moon cold. Sold! The grocers for an orange. The dry cleaners. Hello, Neighbor! A friendly 20" chat the likes of which I've never experienced but have long coveted.

Home. My Beloved. Peace.

Not Appropriate for Work

2011-03-30T21:11:00.002-04:00

I was complaining to a friend recently about the difficulty I have at times with the autocorrect feature on my phone and tablet. He sent me here: http://damnyouautocorrect.com/. This is my favorite.

Remembering Geraldine Ferraro

2011-03-26T20:57:00.000-04:00

I learned this evening of the death of Geraldine Ferraro.

She was the vice presidential running mate to Mondale's failed bid for the presidency in 1984. It is always shocking to hear of the passing of an icon, especially an untimely loss. She was not "like me." She was wealthy, extremely well-educated, upper class. But there are truths about being a minority that transcend, and I was inspired by her confidence and faith. I am not now what I thought I would be at this age when I witnessed her historic campaign, but I have called upon my memory of her grit throughout my career.

My heart goes out to her family and all other women who, like me, are mourning the loss of a hero.

One Cubic Yard of Dirt

2011-03-23T20:11:00.000-04:00

This year I will use the "square foot gardening" method. It promises considerable output for less resources (fertilizer, seeds, sweat, etc.). There are several websites to assist with planning. I had the best luck here. So, what have I decided to grow?

Peas! Lettuce! Carrots!

My goal is to stagger the planting of the radishes, carrots, lettuce, scallions and spinach. I'm not putting in any corn, even though a pot of it is my favorite summertime dinner!, because it is important to be successful this first year. Some crops, like corn and tomatoes, can be tricky since they are so affected by weather (both heat and humidity). As a good scientist, I don't want too many variables that will make it hard to identify keys to success or failure.

We're coordinating with the neighbors (family of four, including two teenagers) to maximize our yield. She's doing Roma tomatoes, I'm growing yellow cherry tomatoes. I'm in charge of herbs (other beds which are not captured in the grid above will house the herbs) and she's doing squash, but we're running independent on peas and lettuce since those are so easy to consume. By golly, we've our own CSA!

Goal Accomplished

2011-03-18T23:35:00.002-04:00

Why Do You Build Me a Buttercup

2011-03-18T21:21:00.001-04:00

My Beloved built me a raised bed. What to plant?

tomatoes
basil
zucchini
sugar snap peas
buttercrunch lettuce
?

SPRING BREAK!!!!!

2011-03-18T20:53:00.001-04:00

Classes resume in T-10 days. Goals until then:

crochet two baby blankets for twins due in July
clean out my closet and recycle clothes
plant the garden (!!!)
lose 10lbs
get ahead on all my projects at work
learn a really good song on the ukulele
finish all outstanding projects ever started
transform my life

You don't think I'm over planning this, am I?

Genius Runs In the Family

2011-03-18T20:50:00.000-04:00

Lisa's website: http://lisadesantisphotography.carbonmade.com/

In 3 years when she is traveling rural China for National Geographic, you'll be able to say "I saw her genius from the beginning!" Welcome to the bandwagon.

Distractions

2011-03-14T18:51:00.001-04:00

I came home from work early tonight specifically to finish my final paper for class. However, I checked my personal email before beginning and found this note from The University:

I am emailing you from the Drexel Fellowships Office because of your outstanding academic record. If you are interested in studying, doing research, or teaching English abroad, then keep reading. The Fulbright and various UK Scholarships provide funding to outstanding students to do just that.

I realize this is an auto-email and, while I do have a 3.94 (stoopid A minus!), there is nothing else this person knows about me to suggest I would be an appropriate candidate for a Fulbright or Rhodes scholarship. I have a full-time job and a family. Of course, that doesn't mean I couldn't take a sabbatical and bring My Beloved with me. And, thus, I have spent the last 20" reading about applications and grant offerings instead of compiling my thoughts on the use of attitudes towards laws on pornography as a predictor of political conservatism. Ugh!

I Was Totoro.

2011-03-10T20:53:00.012-05:00

...for the Oscar's Party.

10,000,000,000,000 points to SASHA!!

5,000,000,000,000 points to BLAKE!!

2 points to Ted for tuning in :)

Four Eyes

2011-03-08T22:42:00.000-05:00

I can't read close up or small type far away. Close up, it hurts my eyes to focus. Far away, it's all blurry and no amount of scrunching my eyes will make it better. Does that make me nearsighted? Farsighted?

Last week, I went for an eye exam. I recall the doctor talking me through his interpretation of these definitions, and we determined that my eyes focus beyond the back of my eye. My prescription was + numbers, and, according to the intarweb, a + prescription means I'm farsighted. Yet, the lady said "these are for distance" when I picked them up. I've been all over Google tonight, and I don't think she's right. Well, either she's not right or I have the wrong prescription. If I'm farsighted, why would she say "these are for distance?" Also, the lenses are different for each eye, but I think they are too different (hence the splitting headache in my right eye).

For those who wear corrective lenses, here are my questions:

How long did it take to get use to them?
What does it mean if everything looks flat and I can see colors, particularly looking at black text on white? Black doesn't look black, but a composite of reds, greens, and blues. This happens with my dimestore magnifiers, but I thought it was b/c they were cheap glasses. These new ones? So not cheap. I am not amused.

Foto Friday

2011-03-02T21:24:00.000-05:00

Me as a character from an Oscar-nominated movie for a party last weekend.

Leave your guesses in the comments! (immediate family dq'd)

Additional Thoughts on Ms. Munroe

2011-02-26T18:14:00.000-05:00

Is it reasonable to expect an employee to not have an internet presence?

My tinfoil-hatted Beloved aside, everyone is online. The internet is so pervasive in our daily lives: email, banking, games, dating, on-line education, libraries, movies. When's the last time you went more than 24hrs off-line?

What are reasonable measures the average person should be expected to take to preserve her privacy? My internet presence is more likely to be discovered through my friend/colleague network than it is by someone deliberately searching for me. Years ago, I came into work and saw a co-worker reading my blog. I hadn't shared this activity with her, although I had shared the link with a few friends from work. Presumably, one of them shared it with her. I wonder if that is how Ms. Munroe was discovered. I don't use full names, although I do share pictures. Doesn't everyone?

In Ms. Munroe's case, is the school board in a fury that she wrote about her students and her job on the internet? Or that she wrote about them in such unflattering terms?

1st Amendment 2 Late

2011-02-24T23:17:00.000-05:00

There's story on the news of late about a teacher who had a blog wherein she ranted about her students, her job, the district, life, etc. According to the news report, it was quite laced with profanity. She did not reveal her full name, but did post her picture, and did not refer to any students/district/school/parents by name. You guessed it: eventually, the kids found it. The school district honcho is quoted as saying the teacher has lost the respect and confidence of her students, their parents, and her colleagues. Everyone is on tenterhooks to learn what will be her fate.

Stories like this make me absolutely paranoid about my internet presence and this blog, in particular. I try to keep it rated G, but there are times when only a $(*$%@) will do. As an online diary, it is bound to be the place where I transcribe those personal musings that might get me into trouble. My readership numbers in the single digits, but I also have not taken any great care to conceal my identity. Somehow, the students found their teacher. It's foolish to think I am any better concealed.

In a conversation with friends about this story, I was interested in the opinions of my friends with children of an impressionable age. One felt it was bunk, basically, and that the teacher was just blowing off steam. But, she also wasn't aware of the [reported] generous use of profanity.

Even if this teacher is not terminated from her job, or, if she is, reinstated through a first amendment rights suit, isn't it still too late? In my ethics class last quarter, we lamented that what is legal isn't always what is ethical. I'm not saying her blog was unethical at all, but regardless of the outcome, this controversy will follow her for days.

Interestingly, at the end of the news report, they play a clip of the teacher saying she feels that students need to learn from their mistakes. It isn't clear from the context if that is what she was griping about on her blog (kids are coddled and never can learn from repercussions b/c teachers aren't allowed to enforce repercussions) or if she is speaking about her own circumstances.

Going the Wrong Way, Part II

2011-02-15T23:05:00.000-05:00

While the rest of the nation digs its way out of debt, overspending, and maxed out credit cards, I have spent days hunched over this glowing screen trying to figure out how to fund this dream come true.

We are not hurting by any stretch of the imagination, but four years of tuition in 15 months is just a bit quicker than I can rustle up that kind of coin. That new car will now be a graduation present to myself (thank goodness I held off on the purchase!). Fancy vacations will be put on hiatus because I won't have the time to take them anyway. And now would be the time to finally take my household budget seriously. Surely there must be scholarships available for middle age white women, right?

Foto Friday

2011-02-12T00:12:00.002-05:00

Tomorrow will be my Gram's 95th birthday. She is a wartime baby, and I mean the Great War, and emigrated to the US from Germany when she was just a school girl.

She's not so much with us anymore, if you get my meaning, and I sincerely hope that where ever she escapes to is a warm and sunny place filled with her happiest memories. I'm looking forward to holding her hand again, and looking into her blue, blue eyes. (My mom has her eyes. I like that I can see my mom in her.) She has gnarled, arthritic hands, which I can begin to see in my own fingers.

I'm also looking forward to seeing my cousins, who I haven't visited in years. They speak with a southern Maryland drawl, and are quick and generous with their humor. It's such a different culture, where they come from, and I'm excited to spend some time away from my world and live in theirs for a day.

Persistence Repaid

2011-02-11T22:28:00.001-05:00

This is what I saw in my inbox this evening:

We have determined that we would like to move forward and have you begin classes in our program starting in the Fall of 2011.

Thank you, Jeebus! I am overjoyed, relieved, grateful, and so, so happy!

You're Going the Wrong Way!

2011-02-07T23:22:00.000-05:00

Planes, Trains & Automobiles

I'm going about this all wrong.

If there's one thing that Hollywood has taught me, it's that with enough grit, hard work, and the right soundtrack, I can overcome any obstacle. Lesson internalized? Check! However, the lesson I need to learn is how to work better with what I have.

At the Super Bowl party this weekend (at which I won twenty dollars! whoot!), a friend shared her favorite saying from her sons' daycare: You get what you get and you don't get upset. So, The University won't let me do what I want. Deal. There is time, now, before the MPH starts, during in the Spring and Summer quarters to pack away some extra Communications courses. I can pick up the 4 or so remaining classes within 6 mos after the MPH is over. What's the rush?

(Um, Hi. I'm Juliane. Apparently we've just met.)

In the face of this bureaucratic challenge from The University, I could zig and simply go to another school.

Gary "Figgsy" Figgis: You don't go down Broadway to get to Broadway! You zig! You zag!

However, part of the award from the Masters in Public Health program, much like an MBA, is the contacts and relationships that are created. I'll miss out on that opportunity if I complete an online program.

I should embrace the challenge I am in and not be so focused on the one which lies ahead. How can I appease the administration while forging ahead with what I want? Not everything I'm going to learn through this adventure will be taught in the classroom. The lesson is in the journey, right?

And So It Begins

2011-02-03T23:40:00.000-05:00

I am presently trying to enroll in a Masters in Public Health (MPH) program at the same school where I am also pursing my Masters in Science Communication. Yesterday, I contacted the Office of Graduate Studies to learn how to apply. I was emailed the names for the advisor for the Communication program and the advisor for Public Health and told they could help with the process.

Tonight, my message to the advisor for Public Health was returned with this snarky missive:

Jill - I'm not quite sure why you're emailing me on this issue. I am the director of the MS in Public Policy, which is obviously different from both the MPH and the MS in COMM. My guess is that you should contact [the] Office of Graduate Studies

First, my name is not Jill.
Second, the Office of Graduate Studies told me to contact you
Third, there is confusion about what, exactly, it is that you teach. I suggest you confirm your area of expertise with your employer.

Turns out, I can't do it. Quite literally, there is no process to pursue two, independent degrees simultaneously. I have the option of combining them into a dual degree program (not possible with the MPH curriculum), or I can pursue them consecutively. But, the university bureaucracy is so broken that it cannot accommodate more than one degree record at a time, and, so, it is either one at a time, or combining them into one.

Pardon me while I gape in awe at my inability to convince this esteemed institution of higher learning to, for the love of Fred, take my money.

http://www.thebadchemicals.com/?p=431

Shrink Wrap

2011-02-02T23:18:00.000-05:00

Today was the worst day I have, thankfully, had in a long, long time, and that includes the night of my appendicitis. Pick any area of my life: romance, health, work, money, school, all of it was failing. As I sat in my car on campus having a good sob to get over it before facing the class, I asked myself: how will you manage a second degree program? a job search? the time for training for a triathlon?

Sometimes change comes into our lives gradually, like the fable told in Holes of the man carrying the pig up the mountain. At first, as a baby pig, it is a small burden. As the pig grows, the man becomes stronger, until it is no longer such a burden for him to carry it up the mountain. We make room for the change and almost don't even notice the difference. Slowly, we stretch to encompass the new activity.

Other times, change is sudden, like registering for 12 credits after a 15 year hiatus from school. There is a tense period of adjustment. That's a lot of stretch all at once.

No one walks around with their lives wrapped loosely around them. We're shrink wrapped. No wonder change can be so hard.

Rubicon

2011-01-31T23:27:00.000-05:00

My friend, Jenny Jen, and I will turn 40 within a year of each other (our birthdays are almost exactly a year apart). We agreed to make it a year of celebration. At first we pondered what turning 40 means to us. Is it a time to prove our mettle, and go skydiving? Should we define our selflessness and go dig wells in Africa? Should we embrace the wrinkles and grey hair and do a long, spa weekend? Last weekend while doing laps in the pool, we hit upon the perfect solution: one activity per quarter representing the healthier, wealthier, and wiser souls that we are. So far, we have 1) triathlon, and 2) $X savings goal [I'm saving for that car, still]. For wiser, I decided to apply to the Drexel executive MPH program for this fall.

We need a fourth category. Any suggestions?

Design by Ann Taintor

Foto Friday - Like Mother, Like Daughters

2011-01-21T23:30:00.000-05:00

Keisa

Scout

Snickett

The Next 5 Books

2011-01-18T21:42:00.000-05:00

The next 5 books I want to read are:

Care to make a suggestion?

Resolutions

2011-01-18T21:20:00.001-05:00

It's taken until today for me to finally unpack completely from my business trip. The weather was snowy last night and freezing rain this morning, which meant Juliane worked from home all day. (SIDE NOTE: I am la-hoving not working in a lab and being able to do my job from the comfort and safety of my home.) My commute to work is a bit of a haul, so if I don't get there in the morning, I lose too much time in transit to justify making the trek later in the day. The upshot of working from home is that I am (usually) to get 10x6 times more done. Sometimes, a face-to-face is so much more effective and speedy than an email. Fortunately, none of those issues came up today, so I was able to focus on all that work I didn't get done last week while meeting the new client. I'm feeling good, now, because I finally put away all those nagging loose ends. Ah, sweet closure!

What is hanging over your head that you could put to bed today?

Family of Athletes

2011-01-17T22:30:00.000-05:00

My kid sister is running the HTC Relay!

Training since she was 2.5 years old!

(She trains with weights - those are Easter eggs in her hands)

Foto Friday - San Francisco

2011-01-15T22:27:00.001-05:00

Looking up the Golden Gate Bridge

Coit Tower

Palace of Fine Arts

I left my heart in San Fran-cheesy.

I Am Harry's Computer Rage

2011-01-15T22:19:00.000-05:00

I get my temper from my father. At least, that's who I am blaming for the white rage roiling in my breast right now. My new class uses a statistical software package called SPSS. Turns out, it won't run on a Mac. This, after 2.5 hrs of hurling myself against the intarweb. The blogs and webpages dedicated to deriding and cursing this program, its developers, the developers' mothers, etc., is startling and gives vent to my spleen.

I just installed it on my work laptop in <10 mins. [grumble Microsoft grumble Steve Jobs grumble]

Jet Lag

2011-01-13T02:10:00.001-05:00

Since when is 5am an acceptable time to hold a teleconference? Can you get anymore east-coast-centric? Working on an extended vacation and calling in once every 3 days is one thing. Working a 19-hr day because I'm supporting a west coast client is a bit stiff, don't you agree? /end rant

This happens so infrequently that I don't care, but tomorrow at 4:30am I'm gonna care like the dickens!

PS guess who is going to Paris in July? what's the time difference for France?!

You Would Have Been Proud

2011-01-12T01:16:00.000-05:00

Many friends complain that dinner party conversation is equivalent to the seventh circle of hell. What is there to talk about with complete strangers? What if I'm stuck with someone boring/weird/psycho? How do I eat ribs without wearing sauce down my shirt and char in my teeth?

All of these, I say, are legitimate concerns.

However.

I also say: You need to dig that well deeper.

Every time I'm out of my comfort zone, I'm digging my well. Fiberglass up my nose and in my collar? Dig it; that attic needs to be insulated. Stuck on a sweaty airplane with a kid kicking my seat and the guy in front in full recline? Dig it; I don't make enough to fly first class.

At a dinner party with a dozen total strangers? Dig it. Sure it might be a few hours I just need to weather, but it also might be the forum for a life-long friendship/to meet the perfect mate for my best friend/for the "a ha!" moment that determines the next step in my career. Regardless, I can always use more practice at good table manners!

Traveling Alone

2011-01-10T22:03:00.000-05:00

Like the end of a house party or the day after week-long house guests, the departure of My Beloved for home has left a thunderclap of empty in his wake. we had such fun together exploring San Francisco again! Our first day was overcast and foggy, so we disappeared up Coit's Tower. At night, we walked along Fisherman's Wharf and got an up close and personal visit from a huge sea lion. The following day, we walked from the wharf across the Golden Gate Bridge to Sausalito and saw dolphins and seals hunting in the waters below. They were memorable vacation moments.

Now, I am on my own preparing for the rest of the week and the first face-to-face meeting with a new client. Nervous. Homesick. Cold.

I forced myself out of the hotel room today to lookabput on my own, although I'd much have preferred to sit moping in bed. But my parents didn't raise no wallflowers and the adventure is still an adventure whether shared or alone.

/time warp

I'm now back at the hotel after an afternoon of shopping, acupuncture, and a polish-free mani. I'm watching the Tostitos bowl game waiting for my colleague to arrive so I can finally get some dinner. Our hotel is in Industrial Way, Anytown,USA so it'll be an evening of room service unless she wants to cab it to downtown for some sushi (half hoping?). The want to curl up in bed never quite goes away; but I usually feel better for not caving in to it. I've practiced my slides and laid out all my accoutrements for an early early start. I am fearless. (say it with me, folks!) I am fearless....

GO DUCKS!